So these straight guys I know, I’m the gay one of the bunch. We all have an open channel between us. Well, we physically shared an ongoing workstream, pre-COVID, that I miss, every damn day I open my laptop up to work from home. Isolated. This is not the best thing that has happened to me work-wise. It’s been the opposite. To be honest. But these guys. My friends. They have my back. And I have theirs if it ever comes to that. These are what businesses used to attempt to call “best friends” in the business sphere a few years back in the yearly review process.
While we tend to be off-color with one another, today we talked about jacking off. It was, well, odd, but not weird. We are all friends. Very different men. Most of us married. But, well, it was kind of balancing. As a gay man, of a certain era where I had straight guys knock me out, shout at me, shame me, egg my face… this new group of straight males, whom I have always wanted to find and seek solace among? Well, I guess I finally found it. During one of the worst years in recent memory sexually, I guess a lot of us are feeling it differently. Men being men among men regardless of what each of our inclinations leans toward. Accepting each other as equals. and sharing our experiences.
But, I mean, the context is COVID and being responsible isolated people. Still, beyond that looking at this set of friendships, the sharing and lack of fear. I guess I feel lucky tonight. This would have been a rare exception back in the ’80s. Let alone the decades before my teens. These straight guys? Well, they give me hope in men again. We are all truly the same animals. But as the times change, so does the male ego.
It took me reaching 50 years old to find people like these guys. I would love to have grown up in a world like this, as a teen, instead of being bullied. These guys though? Nonsexual of course. But sharing aspects and humor that is pretty private. Our experience as men. It was not so much of a wildly off-color conversation so much as it was a leveling share between friends. I wish the world was populated with more of these three guys than it has been in the past. These friends, well, they give me hope for change. All of us different. But equal. Being vulnerable and open.